Grace
by Norah Rose
Summary: Castiel is captured by Lucifer and has his Grace ripped from him. Dean and Sam must help him come to terms with being human. Primarily Dean and Castiel friendship, but plenty of Sam as well.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: Hello all! Here's a new story for you. I'm not sure if it's any good, but I sure enjoyed writing it. I am planning on continuing it, but feedback would be amazing. Thanks always for reading and reviewing.**

Castiel came to slowly. He found that he was lying on the floor of a large, empty room. Every breath he took sent pain rushing to his blood-stained chest. He tilted his head forward to discover that the Angel Banishing symbol carved into his chest was gone; healed.

Although it wasn't visible, the power of the sign lingered and made it difficult for Castiel to breathe. He peered around slowly, realizing, to his horror, that he was trapped inside a ring of Holy Fire.

The angel frantically looked around the room for his captor, but he saw no one. Castiel stood slowly to his feet. "Dean?" He called into the shadows of the room, cautiously. "Sam?"

A figure stepped slowly out of the shadows. "Dear Castiel..." Lucifer said, taking another step into full view. "How nice it is to see you."

"Lucifer," Castiel replied, gravely. Lucifer took another step towards Castiel's prison of fire.

"You are quite hard to get a hold of, Castiel. I've been trying to track you down for some time now. Good thing we were both in the same area. That made things so much simpler. I am sure that you're quite aware of what I need from you." Lucifer said, sounding eerily pleasant.

Castiel simply stared at Lucifer. When he didn't reply, Lucifer started again.

"I need the Winchesters… both of them." He said, ominously.

The trapped angel was immediately confused. Both? Sam was his vessel. Dean would be of no use at all! As if reading his mind, Lucifer spoke again.

"You're confused. This is understandable. After all, you are aware of my… circumstances. Sure, Sam Winchester is my one, true vessel, but if we're being honest, I have taken a liking to Dean. I find that he and I are more alike than Sam and I, even. I don't often grow attached to humans, but Dean is different. He is strong and stubborn… and a merciless torturer. I intend on using his abilities." Lucifer paced in front of Castiel as he finished speaking.

Castiel felt his fists clenching and he struggled to contain his anger. "Dean Winchester is good. He is pure. You will never have him." He answered loudly.

Lucifer clicked his tongue and gazed at Castiel. "See, that is where you are wrong, brother. After a small amount of convincing, Dean would willingly join me. Do you know that he enjoyed torturing, Castiel? He often dreams of the souls he tortured… and he longs to cause that kind of pain again. He misses torturing. He yearns for it. He longs to feel his blade under the skin of some poor, defen…"

"Stop!" Castiel commanded, interrupting Lucifer. "You are lying and wasting time. I will never, ever help you get Dean and Sam. I would die before I gave you any information about them."

Lucifer eyed Castiel curiously. "You do amaze me, Castiel. So passionately defending two measly, insignificant humans… You are far superior to them, and yet, you willingly serve them. Why?"

Castiel drew a sharp breath. "Because…" He started. "People are good, Lucifer. Everything they do and feel, the way they care for each other, the way that they love; God was right. Humans are his most wonderful creation." He finished, strongly.

"You feel, don't you, young one?" Lucifer asked, turning his head to one side. "You care about the Winchesters; about Sam and Dean."

Castiel nodded slightly. "They are… my friends. I will defend them with everything that I have… With my life."

"So I see." Lucifer said, looking at the ground. "You are so very interesting to me, Castiel, or 'Cas', as the Winchesters affectionately call you. Nice nickname they've given you. I quite like it."

Castiel's eyes widened at the use of his nickname. "It is 'Castiel' for you. Dean tells me that nicknames are a sign of friendship. You are anything but my friend." A slight confidence shone in the angel's voice.

Lucifer took a half-step back. "Do not forget who you are speaking to, Castiel." He said, pronouncing Castiel's full name loudly. "Little Deano…" Lucifer clicked his tongue again. "He can do no wrong, can he? You hold him in high respect… Too high. He will fail. Dean Winchester will fail, and you will witness it. How can you fight against what our Father wants?" Lucifer asked Castiel.

At this, Castiel's face darkened. "None of this is our Father's wish. This is the result of your selfishness. A petty argument between brothers has turned into a war. This is your fight, Lucifer, and Michael's, do not bring the entire planet into it as well. It is… your own damn problem."

Lucifer only shook his head at Castiel's words. "You have changed so much. You are even beginning to sound like a Winchester, my friend."

"Do not call me your friend." Castiel stated, simply.

Lucifer waved this off. "Cursing is not something you would have done before." Lucifer said, solemnly. "They're changing you."

"Then I'm changing for the better." Castiel said, proudly. "I was blind before. Following blindly. I was wrong. I know that now and I will fight for what I know is right. I will fight for Sam and Dean with every single thing I have." He ended.

"I can see that." Lucifer said, slowly. "What am I supposed to do then, Castiel? I can't let you go. I do have a reputation to uphold. Killing you would not help me. It would only drive Sam farther away. So what now?"

Castiel simply stared at Lucifer. His bright, blue eyes boring into him. Lucifer suddenly had an idea; a certain epiphany.

"I know exactly what I'll do with you!" He said, a smile forming on his broken face. "Can't believe I didn't think of this sooner. How genius of me…" Lucifer rambled to himself.

Castiel was growing nervous. "What… what will you do?" He asked, quietly.

"I'm going to take your Grace of course!" Lucifer replied, cheerfully. "What's left of it, at least."

Castiel's eyes widened in fear. "No. You… you cannot do this."

"Oh, but I must!" Lucifer replied, still pleased with himself.

Castiel began to panic. "But this… this is the worst thing. Please Lucifer, do not do this."

"Don't beg Castiel, it doesn't become you. This is, obviously, my only option. I can't let you go back to the Winchesters and be help! So, I'll let you go back and be a burden. That helps me so."

With this, Lucifer raised his arm and pointed his hand at Castiel. The trapped angel suddenly felt an excruciating pain in his chest. A bright, white light blinded Castiel and he could feel his Grace ripped out of his chest against his will. It was more pain than he could ever imagine. In an instant, Castiel fell to the ground and the world went dark.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note: The amount of feedback I've gotten on this story is pretty overwhelming. Thanks for all the comments, story alerts, and author alerts. I honestly wasn't sure about continuing this story, what with the show actually going this direction, but I suppose I will. Thanks always for reading and reviewing! BTW: We're going to assume that having your Grace ripped out of you is REALLY exhausting. Oh, and Castiel's memory is all kinds of screwy. It's different than the show… but hey, that's fan fiction! That is all. Enjoy!**

"Dean, over here!" Castiel could hear Sam Winchester's muffled voice echo around him. He could hear the heavy footsteps of someone running towards him. His back was cold on the dusty ground, and he found it nearly impossible to open his eyes. He was far too tired to keep them open.

In an instant, Sam's voice was directly over Castiel; much closer than before. "Dean!" He yelled again. There was a hint of panic in Sam's usually calm voice when he spoke to Castiel. "Hey Cas. You take it easy. We're gonna get you out of here and you'll be fine."

Castiel opened his eyes long enough to take in the younger Winchester's face. Sam's eyes were wide, and his hair was falling into his face. He appeared to be out of breath. Castiel lost control of his eyelids and saw darkness again.

His mind raced. He couldn't remember anything. Where was he? What happened to him? Castiel's thoughts were interrupted by the sound of more loud footsteps running towards him.

"Sammy, how is he?" Dean asked quickly. Castiel felt a warm hand rest on his shoulder. The touch brought him a certain amount of relief in contrast to the cold floor. Cold. Why was he cold?

This brought many more questions racing to Castiel's mind. Had he been cold before? He couldn't remember the feeling. Maybe he was sick? Or perhaps demons had infected him with something… Try as he might, Castiel simply could not remember what had happened to him.

Castiel struggled to open his eyes again. This time, he saw only Dean's face. The older Winchester looked even more distraught than Sam. Dean's eyes were wide with panic, and he was breathing quickly. Castiel glanced sideways and saw that the warmth on his shoulder was being provided by Dean's hand.

Castiel then turned his eyes to his surroundings. He was in a very large, empty room. In fact, it appeared to be a warehouse. Glancing around, Castiel realized that he had been here before. He couldn't remember details, but he had been fighting here. How had it ended?

"Can you walk, Cas?" Dean asked, interrupting his thoughts. Castiel attempted to sit up, but found that he could barely move his legs. He was utterly exhausted.

Castiel tried once more to get up. This time, he made it to a sitting position, and then felt extremely dizzy. He fell backwards to the ground, making a loud "clang" as he hit the metal ground.

"Whoa!" Sam said, reaching out for Castiel. "We're going to have to help him." Sam said simply, looking at Dean.

Dean ran his hand over his upper lip, and nodded in agreement with his brother. "Let's go then." He said, and pulled Castiel towards him. Dean supported one side of Cas, and Sam supported the other.

Castiel tried desperately to be of more help and find his footing, but every movement brought another wave of dizziness. Castiel felt afraid.

Dean glanced towards Cas and saw the fear in his wide, blue eyes. He tightened his grip on Castiel and spoke reassuringly. "You're gonna be fine, Cas. Trust me."

Castiel felt that he did trust Dean, however, this statement also made him feel all the more weak. He attempted once more to walk on his own. Suddenly, the room began to sway uncontrollably, and the world went dark again.

Dean and Sam winced as Castiel's body went limp, but they continued, now fully carrying him, to the car. Once at the Impala, they lowered Castiel carefully into the back seat. He was breathing slowly.

Dean drove as quickly as possible to the motel that they had a room at. As they drove, the Winchester brothers discussed everything that had happened.

"He's different, Sammy. Can you tell?" Dean asked, gravely, glancing back towards Castiel. "What do you think happened to him? He pressed further.

Sam ran a hand through his hair and sighed deeply. "I don't know. But he's weak, weaker than we've ever seen him. Maybe we need to call Bobby. Man, I don't know."

"Let's just wait. We need to ask Cas what happened first. I don't want to drag Bobby into this unless we have to." Dean said, after a moment of consideration.

"That's if he can tell us…" Sam said, looking back at Castiel gravely.

Dean looked over at Sam and reached to turn up the music. The brothers didn't speak again until they pulled into the shabby motel where they were staying. Castiel barely stirred in the backseat. Dean turned into a space and turned the Impala off.

Sam and Dean carried each supported Castiel and carried him into their room. They laid him on one of the two small beds. Dean took a seat on the end of the bed where Castiel was, and Sam sat in the wooden desk chair.

Both Winchester's kept their eyes on Castiel. His breathing was slow, but steady. They were, nonetheless, worried. This angel had become more than an ally, he had become their friend.

Dean suddenly turned to Sam. "I don't know what to do, Sammy." He said, in distress.

Sam stood to his feet slowly. "We could start by talking to him." He walked towards Castiel. 

Dean looked at him, doubtfully. "Maybe we should, I don't know, let him rest or whatever." He said, turning to watch Castiel.

Sam shook his head. "We really don't have time for rest right now. End of the world, remember? If we're gonna have to get Bobby on this, we need to find out as soon as we can."

"You're right, yeah." Dean said in agreement. He still didn't look sold on the idea though.

Sam slowly walked over to Castiel and placed his hand on the injured man's shoulder. "Cas…" He said, quietly. He shook Castiel gently. There was no movement. "Castiel," He spoke again, louder this time. Castiel still didn't move.

"Maybe you're right, Dean." Sam said, glancing at his brother. "He's out pretty good. Why don't you try?" Sam asked, eyeing Dean.

"He didn't wake up for you, how the hell would me trying be any different?" Dean asked.

Sam shrugged, casually. "I don't know, dude. You guys have the We-Were-In-Hell-Together connection and everything so I just though that maybe…"

"Alright, fine." Dean interrupted, leaning towards Castiel.

Dean shook Castiel as Sam had. "Hey Cas, get up!" He said, gruffly. Castiel didn't move. Dean looked at Sam and raised an eyebrow.

"Try again…" Sam said, quietly. Dean rolled his eyes.

"Castiel… we need to talk to you!" Dean said, shaking him again.

This time Castiel stirred and opened his eyes slowly. "Told you so." Sam said, suddenly. Dean shot him a dirty look.

"Dean. What happened?" Castiel asked slowly, his voice hoarse.

"Well man, we were kinda hoping you could tell us that. And, uh, you're okay, right?" Dean asked.

"Okay?" Castiel asked, his voice filled with confusion.

Dean took a breath. "I mean… you're not dying on us, are you?"

Castiel's eyes lit up a bit as he understood. "No, Dean. I don't think that I am dying."

Dean looked as if a weight had been lifted off his shoulders. "Well that's, uh, awesome. Really. Now… what the hell happened to you?" He asked, suddenly.

Castiel closed his eyes for a moment in thought. "I have no idea. But I fear… that I have lost my Grace." 

Sam and Dean looked at each other in surprise. This would definitely complicate things.


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note: This story is definitely dragging along, but I really adore writing it. I suppose that's all that matters. Hope you enjoy reading it anyway! Thanks always for reviewing. I love it!**

Dean held up his hands, leaning backwards. "Wait. Slow down. Fallen like… fallen fallen? Like, completely mortal, weak, lame human fallen? You're not an angel anymore?" Dean finished, speaking quickly.

"That is what I think." Castiel said, solemnly.

Dean stood up and began to pace the small room. Sam spoke up.

"How the hell could that happen?" He asked, loudly.

Castiel stared at Sam. "Hell is exactly how it could happen. They seem to have taken my Grace. Demons maybe… I just, I can't remember."

Dean continued pacing. Sam pressed further. "How can you even tell?"

Castiel slid slowly to a sitting position on the bed. He was regaining some strength. "I feel… drastically different." He explained. "My body aches, every breath I take is accompanied by pain, my sight seems dimmer… and I really need to use the restroom." He finished, awkwardly.

"Uh, well, I, uh… I assume you'll be fine on your own. You need… uh, help getting there? Or…" Sam trailed off, awkwardly.

Dean let out a loud laugh. "Dude, Cas… just go to the bathroom. Ignore Sammy. You'll be fine."

Castiel looked at Dean, who nodded towards the bathroom reassuringly. The ex-angel slowly stood to his feet. He made his way into the small bathroom carefully, as if he was trying to keep his balance. Once the door was shut, Dean turned to Sam.

"Well, you're the genius here, what are we gonna do?" Dean asked.

Sam shook his head. "I wish I knew. I can call up Bobby; see if he knows of a way to fix this, I doubt it though. We can ask Cas first."

Dean's eyes were suddenly filled with emotion. "We can't leave him like this, Sammy." He said, motioning slightly towards the bathroom.

"I know." Sam answered, quietly. At this Castiel cracked open the bathroom door slightly, and stepped out.

"This is going to be… inconvenient." Castiel said, sitting back on the bed.

Dean cleared his throat, awkwardly. "So, uh, Cas… how do we fix this? I mean, how do we get your Grace back?"

Castiel looked down. "We don't. If my knowledge is correct, only God can restore my Grace."

"We all know how much he freakin' helps!" Dean exclaimed, throwing his arms up dramatically and pacing again. "We're screwed."

Castiel's face fell, and Sam realized this. "Sit down, Dean." He said, gruffly.

Dean raised an eyebrow at Sam, but took a seat on the edge of the other bed. The three sat in silence before Sam interrupted with an attempt to lighten the situation.

"At least we'll always know where you are! You know… no more poofing and…" Sam trailed off quietly. Dean and Castiel glared at him. "Uh, or not." He said, and remained silent.

Dean finally broke the quiet. "I'm going out for, food or something." He mumbled, and quickly left the room.

Castiel slipped back asleep and Sam did some research on angels and Grace. What he found was not at all helpful.

Dean returned some time later with several bags of drive-thru food in one hand and a case of beer in the other. "Hungry?" He asked, and tossed one of the bags at Sam.

The younger brother pulled a salad out of the bag and found himself extremely thankful that Dean had remembered his love for healthier foods. He couldn't deal with all that grease.

Dean's entrance had jolted Castiel awake and he was now sitting up. Suddenly, his stomach growled loudly. He looked down at it in confusion.

Dean chuckled shortly and threw the other bag of food at Castiel. "You're hungry, Cas. Enjoy."

Sam reached for a beer and tossed one to both Dean and Castiel. Castiel fumbled the bottle, and attempted to catch it. The three opened their drinks and ate for a few moments without speaking.

After a very long period of silence, Dean, who was obviously feeling uncomfortable, stood and walked again towards the door. "Think I'll go out for a drink."

"Dude. You just came back…" Sam started, but Dean quickly interrupted him.

"Look man, I want to go out, clear my head, and get a drink. That a freakin' crime now?" Dean snapped.

Sam just shook his head. Castiel suddenly spoke up. "Can I go?" He asked.

Sam glared at Dean. This was definitely a bad idea, but Dean Winchester had never been a man to discourage drinking.

"Well come on then, Cas." Dean shrugged, and turned to the door.

Finally, Sam stepped in, trying to be the responsible one. "No, no way. You're not going, Cas. You're weak and you need to rest."

Castiel stood, shaking, to his feet. He fought to keep his balance.

"You can barely stand." Sam finished, gesturing at Castiel's feet.

Cas straightened up, and looked Sam in the eyes. "Do not treat me like a child, Sam. I want a drink, so I am going to get one." Castiel said darkly, glaring at Sam. He then slowly walked towards Dean, who looked utterly delighted.

Sam whipped around to glare at Dean. He obviously wanted reinforcement.

"You heard the man." Dean said, grinning at Sam. Sam glared back at him.

"Jerk." Sam muttered at Dean.

"Bitch!" Dean retorted, cheerfully, before opening the door to leave.

Dean and Castiel slowly made their way out the door and to the parking lot. They moved extremely slowly, as Castiel was having a hard time walking at all.

The Impala was parked, inconveniently, on the opposite side of the lot. When Dean and Castiel finally got to the car, Castiel was out of breath. Dean opened the doors and hopped into the driver's seat.

Castiel opened the passenger door and suddenly swayed dangerously on his feet. Dean jumped out to steady him, and Castiel latched onto the side of the Impala to keep from falling.

Dean held on securely to Castiel's shoulders. "Alright, Cas… You've gotta stay."

Castiel weakly fought against Dean's grasp. "Want a drink." He mumbled.

Dean wasn't hearing any arguments. "No. Sammy was right. You're not going anywhere. We'll figure out how to fix you, okay Cas? Until then… you've gotta chill. Now come on." Dean then proceeded to lead Castiel slowly back to the room.

They finally arrived at the door, and Dean, still half holding Castiel up, rapped loudly on the door. Sam opened it in an instant.

He immediately jumped to help Dean get Castiel back into bed.

"What happened?" Sam asked, his long hair falling into his face.

"Save it, Sammy. You were right. He's definitely not fit to go anywhere." Dean said, as they laid Castiel on the bed.

"I'm sorry... Dean." Castiel mumbled, quietly, as his eyes closed.

Sam and Dean stood, looking at Castiel for a moment, before turning to each other.

"You still going out for a drink?" Sam asked. "Now I need one…" He said, looking back at Castiel.

"You go." Dean said, gruffly. "Someone should stay and watch over Sleeping Beauty, here?" He gestured towards Castiel.

Sam glanced back at Dean, his forehead wrinkling slightly. "You sure?" He asked.

"Yeah, just, uh… bring me some pie." Dean said, quickly.

Sam chuckled a bit at his brother's always evident love for pie. He walked out the door.

"Later…" He said, taking one last look at his brother before shutting the heavy, motel door.

"Pie!" He heard Dean shout loudly. His voice was muffled through the door, but still very audible. Sam laughed a bit to himself and headed for the Impala.


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's Note: Hello everyone! How about that season finale? WHOA. I still have mixed reactions about it. I'd love to hear your reactions in the comments. Or you know… your reactions to my story. Whatever! Oh, and please remember: This story is set directly after Dean considers saying yes. Thanks for reading and reviewing!**

Once Sam was gone, Dean grabbed another beer and lied back on the empty bed. He took a long breath and rested his head against the wall behind the bed.

Castiel was asleep in the other bed and Dean looked curiously over at him. He looked… remarkably human.

As Dean watched Castiel breath slowly in and out, he couldn't help but feel extremely guilty. This was, after all, completely his fault. Dean had been wrong. So wrong. Castiel had given everything up for him, and Dean was willing to throw it away.

And now… Castiel was a human. Just as weak as Sam and Dean, yet not at all prepared to live a mortal life. The odds were not looking good for the ex-angel. This was all because of Dean.

Castiel had now lost everything, and Dean couldn't do anything at all to help.

Suddenly Dean, who had been absentmindedly staring at Castiel, was surprised to see the man open his eyes. His eyes looked dimmer than usual, but still they were that brilliant blue.

"Dean…" Castiel said, stirring slightly. He struggled to sit up in the bed, obviously feeling uncomfortable in the vulnerable position.

Dean broke the silence with a question. "Beer?" He asked, loudly, opening and passing a bottle to Castiel before he could reply.

Castiel raised his empty hand to his head and leaned forward. His brow furrowed in pain.

"Cas, you okay?" Dean asked, more frantically than he realized.

Waving his hand towards Dean slightly, Castiel shook his head. "My head… it feels… odd." He said, his face still scrunched in pain.

Dean's eyes filled with understanding. "Oh, yeah. Human stuff… of course. Does it feel like… like, some tiny, annoying asshole is chilling out in your head, hammering away at your brain with a hammer?" Dean asked, bluntly.

"Wouldn't have used those oddly specific terms, but yes, I suppose it does." Castiel replied.

Dean stood and walked to his duffle bag on the floor. He rummaged around it for a moment, and pulled out a water bottle and some pills. He opened the pill bottle, eyed Cas for a moment, then pulled out two pills and walked towards Castiel.

"Here." He said, handing Castiel the pills and water bottle. "Take these."

Castiel looked doubtfully at the items in Dean's hand, but swallowed the pills with no argument.

"Dude." Dean said, pointing at Castiel suddenly. "Don't you dare get addicted to those things, you hear me? Don't you do it!" He said, raising his voice slightly.

Castiel looked taken aback. "What are you talking about?" He asked, genuinely ignorant to Dean's interesting visit with his future self.

Dean sighed, considering whether or not to tell Castiel what he'd seen, but then decided that he had nothing to lose.

"Well, you know how Zachariah zapped me to the future? When I was there… well, you were there. But, it wasn't really you. It was Future You. And man, Future You was weird. I'm talking stoned, hippy, sex fiend weird. You were human." Dean finished, simply.

"You think that simply because I am now a human, I will turn into someone different? I am no different, Dean. Weaker, yes, but ultimately… I am the same. Do you not have any faith in me? Do you really believe that I would become that?" Castiel asked, speaking slowly and calmly.

Dean glanced down at his drink and then back at Castiel. "No. No way. But… I've seen it happen. I know it can. So I'm just saying, as a precaution, don't you get addicted to that stuff. I've trashed you enough. I don't need to get you hooked on pain-killers on top of all the other crap."

Castiel stared at Dean for a moment before speaking. "Do you have anything stronger?" He asked, suddenly.

"Uh. What?" Dean retorted, quickly.

Castiel gestured towards the beer that he had left on the table.

Dean immediately understood. "No, no way, man. I mean, yeah, I've got some whiskey in the bag but… beyond the point! You need to get some rest. Besides, you know, pills, alcohol… it could be a bad combination."

Castiel sighed and leaned back. He glanced back at Dean, and very obviously rolled his eyes.

"Hey!" Dean said, pointing at Castiel. "Hey, I saw that! Don't do that! I hate denying you stronger alcohol. It goes against pretty much everything I stand for here, but I'm trying to help, you know."

"If only you had helped earlier…" Castiel muttered under his breath.

Dean heard him and looked down at his drink awkwardly. "Look Cas, I'm sorry. Sammy and me… we looked for you. We came straight in here and looked, but you were nowhere. You just disappeared." Dean raised his face to watch Castiel.

"That's not what I meant." He replied, slowly.

Dean's face filled with realization. "This is about me saying, well, almost, saying yes."

Castiel nodded slightly. Dean drew a sharp breath.

"Listen man. I don't really know what to say. I'm not good at sappy, 'please-forgive-me' speeches, but I guess that's what this is. I am honestly, really sorry. I made a mistake. I mean, I definitely made on hell of a mistake and I regret it. I never should have considered being Michael's meat suit. I wish I could take that back. I do. I'm an idiot. That's completely clear. This, all of this, it's my fault, and I'm sorry." Dean's voice cracked slightly and he cleared his throat, and looked down again.

Castiel stared at him for a considerable amount of time before answering. "I have faith in you, Dean." He said simply, before cutting the lamp next to him off and laying down to go to bed.

Dean sat in silence for several moments before reaching over and grabbing Sam's laptop. He researched ways to return an angel's Grace until Sam returned, hours later.


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's Note: Hello everyone. Quick thing to tell you all, I realize that in the show, the Lucifer/Michael storyline is wrapped up, and I really want to move this story past it too… Only completely AU, of course. Don't be surprised if one of the next chapters transitions to a post heaven/hell war time. That is all! Oh yes, and this story is NOT slash. It will never be slash. It's all friendship. Just thought I'd let you all know!**

When Sam slipped quietly into the motel hours later, Dean was stretched out on one of the small beds, still on the laptop. He glanced over at Sam.

"Hey Sammy…" He mumbled, through a yawn.

Sam glanced at Castiel asleep in the other bed, and then turned back to Dean. "Find anything?" He asked, glancing at the computer. Sam knew what Dean was worried about at the moment.

Dean shut the laptop in frustration. "Nothing, man, I swear. I don't know what we're gonna do." He said, consciously trying to keep his voice low for Castiel's sake.

"Well, we'll find something. We always do. I'm calling Bobby tomorrow. I'm sure he'll have some ideas." Sam answered, reassuringly.

Dean watched Castiel breathe slowly in and out as he slept on the other bed. "You know, I used to wake up with that dude randomly watching me sleep… Now look. I'm sitting here, like a regular creep, watching him. Funny how stuff works out, isn't it?"

"If by funny, you mean awful, then yea, I know exactly what you mean." Sam said, running a hand through his hair.

"Yeah," Dean mumbled in reply.

Changing the subject, Sam glanced awkwardly around the small room. "So, uh, where am I supposed to sleep?"

Dean raised an eyebrow at Sam and then looked at the small, plush chair in the corner.

"Ah, no. But I'm taller!" Sam protested.

Dean only reached to turn off the lamp beside him. "Age trumps height." He called loudly, before lying down dramatically.

After Sam was settled in and the brothers were silent, Sam called into the dark. "Goodnight Dean."

"Night, Sammy." Dean replied, quietly.

"And hey, man… Don't worry. We're gonna get this all fixed. I promise." Sam called, obviously referring to Castiel.

"Yeah, I know." Dean answered. The doubt rang out clearly in his voice.

The Winchesters did not speak again until the next day.

* * *

Sam woke uncomfortably the next morning. Sitting up and looking around the room, he discovered that he was the first up. Dean was sprawled out on one of the beds, and Castiel lay stiffly on the other.

Sam stretched his legs and groaned slightly. He was definitely going to be sore. Sleeping in the tiny chair hadn't done him any favors.

As the younger Winchester got to his feet, Castiel stirred and slowly opened his eyes.

"Hey, man. How you feelin'?" Sam asked, keeping his voice low, so not to wake Dean.

Castiel sat up slowly and replied. "I am feeling… much better." He said, with quiet hesitation.

Sam smiled slightly. "I'm glad to hear that." He grabbed his toothbrush from his bag, and walked into the bathroom, throwing Dean and Castiel one last glance before closing the door.

Sam left Castiel sitting alone. Dean was still asleep on the other bed, and he didn't show any signs of waking up.

Castiel watched Dean curiously as he slept. He had done this many times before, although things had been so very different then. When Castiel was an angel, he hadn't needed sleep. He had stayed awake all night, while everyone else slept, wondering around aimlessly.

Castiel's nights were usually spent sitting in a chair in whatever small motel the Winchesters were staying at. Dean stayed up late and occasionally, Castiel would sit and talk to him.

They usually discussed Sam or the Apocalypse, but occasionally, the conversations would become incredibly "average" and they would discuss Dean's choices in music or television.

Although Castiel was often confused with these conversations, they were better than standing on some roadside alone all night.

Suddenly Dean opened his eyes and Castiel's train of thought was broken. He was still staring at the older brother.

"Dude. Really? I thought we were past the whole 'I get off to you sleeping' thing?" Dean said, sitting up quickly, rubbing his eyes.

Castiel attempted to reply, awkwardly. "I, uh, I was merely…"

"Doesn't matter, Cas. I'm joking." Dean interrupted. He looked quickly around the room. "Where's Sammy?" Dean asked.

Castiel gestured towards the bathroom.

"Oh…" Dean replied, letting out a breath of relief.

Castiel simply stared at him. "So, uh, you… sleep well?" Dean asked, trying to break the silence.

"My sleep was clouded with scattered visions. These visions were random, difficult to interpret, and filled with unexplainable events. What does this mean?" Castiel asked, speaking quickly.

Dean chuckled slightly to himself. "Those are _dreams_, Cas." He replied, smiling.

"Dreams?" Castiel questioned. "Are they bad?"

"Nah, they're normal. Everyone, well, every human… dreams." Dean answered.

Castiel turned his head slightly to the side. "Why?"

Dean shook his head. "Not a clue, man. No one knows. Dreams are like… I don't know, your subconscious or something. The random stuff you think about."

"You were in my dreams." Castiel said, innocently.

Dean looked down awkwardly. "Well that's, uh, that's really weird." He finished, not knowing what to say.

Thankfully, Sam walked out of the bathroom before Castiel could say anything else. Dean jumped quickly to his feet, muttered something about brushing his teeth, and walked quickly to the bathroom. He shut the door loudly behind him.

"Geez, what did you do?" Sam asked, looking questionably at Castiel.

Castiel ignored Sam's question and stood slowly.

"Whoa, Cas. You're probably not up to walking around yet." Sam said, reaching to help Castiel gain balance.

Castiel pushed Sam away. "I'm fine. I do not need your help." He said gruffly, straightening his shirt.

Sam laughed quietly to himself before stepping away from Castiel.

With curiosity in his eyes, Castiel turned to Sam. "What is funny?" He asked.

"Ah, nothing." Sam said, shaking his head. "It's just a little scary how much of an influence Dean's had on you. Sometimes the things you say… They just sound like something that would come straight out of his mouth."

Castiel, as usual, turned his head to one side and stepped a bit closer to Sam. "Is that… bad?" He asked, seriously.

"No." Sam said, stopping to think for a moment. "Honestly, the world could use a couple more people like Dean. Don't get me wrong, the guy's stubborn as hell and that drives me crazy all the time… But, I think he's the only thing in the world that keeps me sane. He keeps me fighting. Like, without Dean, I would have given up a really long time ago. As cheesy as it sounds, his strength kinda keeps me going, you know?" Sam said, saying more than he had intended.

Castiel stared at Sam, not speaking. He then turned his head slowly towards the bathroom door, where Dean was standing, awkwardly.

"Uh, yeah… Good morning, Sammy." Dean said, incredibly awkwardly. "I feel like we should all have a group hug now, but, uh, I'm pretty hungry and not at all in the chick-flick moment mood. How about we just go get some breakfast?"

Sam cleared his throat and nodded at Dean. "Breakfast sounds great." He said, and started for the door.


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's Note: Thanks as usual for all the lovely comments. They keep me going! I still love this story. I hope you all like where it's going. And don't get mad at me for, uh, skipping the Apocalypse. I just really want this story to be about the characters.**

_**Recap: **__"Uh, yeah… Good morning, Sammy." Dean said, incredibly awkwardly. "I feel like we should all have a group hug now, but, uh, I'm pretty hungry and not at all in the chick-flick moment mood. How about we just go get some breakfast?" Sam cleared his throat and nodded at Dean. "Breakfast sounds great." He said, and started for the door._

"All right, Dean. Tell him." Sam said, gesturing towards his older brother. Dean was sitting next to Castiel on the opposite side of the booth in the small restaurant they had chosen for breakfast.

Dean glanced nervously at Castiel. "No way, dude. You. Don't be such a wuss. Tell him." Dean then made a show of turning his back to Castiel, and crossing his arms.

Sam sighed and shook his head. He then shot Dean a dirty look, and turned to face Castiel.

"Uh, listen Cas. Some stuff is about to go down. Big stuff. Like end of the world sized stu…"

"Get on with it!" Dean interrupted, loudly.

"Dude! You just tell him." Sam said, in frustration.

"I swear, if you want something done right…" Dean mumbled to himself, turning to Castiel.

"Here's the deal, Cas. We have a plan. Gabriel told us how to smite the devil, and we're going for it. Sammy's gonna let Lucifer go for a ride in his meat suit, then he's gonna take back control and throw Lucifer into the pit. This will work." Dean spoke quickly, avoiding eye contact with Castiel. It was obvious that he didn't believe his own words.

Castiel looked confused. "I am aware of all of this. I have heard you both talking. Why are you telling me this information again?"

Dean sighed. "Well Cas, uh, you can't come with us when this all goes down. You're gonna hold down the fort at the motel."

Castiel straightened up at this. "No, I am not. Dean… you need me. I have to help you. To keep you safe…" He said gruffly.

Sam glanced at Dean and saw his face grow dark. "I'm sorry, man. I am. You know, I'd rather have all the help I can get with this, but Cas, you're not help right now. You're a burden, and we can't watch out for you right now. There's too much at hand." Dean finished and looked at his plate of food. He didn't want to meet Castiel's eyes.

Castiel's hopeful expression fell drastically at Dean's words. "I understand." He said simply. Castiel then stood up and walked quickly out of the small restaurant.

Sam stood to his feet to follow. "No, man." Dean said, as he held up his hand towards Sam and stood up. "I've got this." He said quickly, and hurried after Castiel.

When the waitress came to the table, Sam awkwardly ordered a cup of coffee and waited.

Outside, Dean was hurrying after Castiel. The ex-angel was walking down the road. He was still a bit slow from his injuries, so Dean had no problem catching up.

"Go away." Castiel said, as Dean came to a steady walk beside him.

"Come on, Cas. Don't be like this. You're acting like some pouty kid that didn't get the last cookie or something. You have to understand why we're doing this." Dean said, speeding up a bit to keep up.

"I understand. Just leave." Castiel said. He tried speeding up and started limping more.

Dean noticed Castiel's limp. "Cas, you're being ridiculous. You're gonna hurt yourself. Now let's go back." Dean placed his arm gently on Castiel's shoulder and pulled him to a stop.

Castiel whirled around and stared at Dean. "You just do not understand, do you?" He yelled suddenly. "I can't be like this. I am…was… an angel, and I was sent here to protect people. To protect you, Dean." He continued, his voice lowering slightly.

"You are not supposed to be the one helping me, healing me… It is wrong. I do not want to be a burden on you and Sam any more. So I am leaving. I'm no help. Just let me go." Castiel finished sadly. He shook Dean's hand off his shoulder and continued walking.

Dean stood still for a minute before jogging to catch up with Castiel. He grabbed Castiel's arm roughly and jerked him to a halt.

"No. You're not doing this, Cas. I won't let you. I need you. Sam needs you. We can't do this alone." Dean spoke quickly and loudly. He stood extremely close to Castiel. "You've saved my life more times than I can count. The least I can do is keep you safe while you're down. Now turn around. We're going back."

Dean then dropped Castiel's arm, turned around, and began walking back to the small restaurant.

Castiel stared at him, before finally starting to follow him. He took two steps and then began to sway on his feet. "Dean…" He called weakly, before falling roughly onto his knees. He stood carefully back up.

Dean turned around to see Castiel collapse. He looked down the road to the restaurant and then back at Castiel, trying to decide what to do. He rushed to Castiel's side.

"Dammit, dammit…" Dean mumbled, helping Castiel up. Dean supported him and walked slowly back into the restaurant.

Sam was still sitting at the booth. He now had a cup of coffee.

"What the hell, man. Did you hit him?" Sam said, reacting to Castiel leaning on Dean and sliding cautiously into the booth.

Dean looked at Sam in surprise. "No! I didn't… hit him." Dean answered, as if Sam was being ridiculous. "He just… it was too much. He'll be fine." Dean glanced sideways at Castiel. "Fine, right?" He asked.

Castiel nodded, taking a sip of his drink. "Fine." He said, simply.

Sam looked back and forth and Dean and Castiel quickly. "Uh, are you both… ready to go?"

Dean and Castiel slowly slid out of the booth. Sam watched Castiel cautiously.

"You need help?" Sam asked, stepping forward towards Cas.

"No." Castiel said, turning to walk out of the restaurant.

Dean and Sam were left standing alone as Castiel walked out to the Impala. Sam turned to Dean.

"What's the plan?" He asked, watching his older brother carefully.

"We're going to Bobby's." Dean answered, roughly.

Sam looked momentarily confused. "Bobby's?" He questioned further.

"We're putting Cas in the safe room. We're leaving him there until this is over. He can't help us, and the damn angel is too stubborn to let us go alone."

"Not an angel," Sam mumbled quietly.

"Yeah, whatever." Dean snapped back, walking out to meet Castiel at the Impala.


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's Note: Hello! Everyone please keep in mind, this is very AU. Bobby's still in a wheel chair and the Apocalypse has not happened yet. It will (kind of) soon! Please review 3 Thanks all!**

**Recap: **_"We're going to Bobby's." Dean answered, roughly. Sam looked momentarily confused. "Bobby's?" He questioned further. "We're putting Cas in the panic room. We're leaving him there until this is over."_

The drive to Bobby's house was completely silent. Dean gripped the steering wheel tightly and Sam stared out the passenger's side window. Castiel sat in the back. He was fighting to stay awake. Cars seemed to always make him drowsy now that he was human.

When they arrived at Bobby's small house, all three men walked silently to the door. Bobby seemed a bit surprised by their arrival, but he let them in nonetheless.

"So… what do you idjits need?" Bobby asked gruffly, as he rolled himself into the living room. Sam, Dean, and Castiel followed his lead and each took seats.

No one answered Bobby for a moment before Dean finally spoke up. "I, we… need your help, Bobby. Can I, uh, talk to you in the other room?" He finished, struggling to find the right words.

As Bobby followed Dean into the kitchen, he shot Sam a wary glance. Castiel merely glared at Dean as he walked by. He wasn't fond of all these secrets.

When Dean and Bobby reached the kitchen, Dean lowered his voice and stepped closer to Bobby. "Look, we've got a problem here."

"Just tell me what you boys messed up this time." Bobby said, shaking his head.

Dean looked down and answered with one word. "Castiel." He said, solemnly.

Dean then proceeded to tell Bobby everything.

Back in the living room, Sam and Castiel sat awkwardly looking around the room. Sam tried desperately to start a conversation.

"So, Cas… End of the world…" Sam trailed off.

Castiel, who had been staring straight ahead, turned stiffly towards the younger Winchester. "You are either hitting on me or you are terrible at breaking the silence." Castiel said, seriously.

Sam laughed and his hair fell slightly into his eyes. "You really have been around Dean too much." He said, before falling silent again.

Castiel only looked back in front of him. Sam decided not to try and make small talk anymore. Besides, his statement needed no further explanation. It was true.

Everyday Castiel acted a little bit more like Dean. He laughed at the most immature things, every word he said was laced with sarcasm, and Sam could have sworn that he heard Cas mutter a "that's what she said" joke the other day.

It was all very amusing, yet troubling. Castiel had once been so innocent and pure. He had literally been an angel. He had given up all of that for Dean, and now it seemed like he was simply going to become just like Dean.

Sam was interrupted from his thoughts suddenly when Bobby and Dean reentered the room. Bobby's face was lined with worried and Dean looked as though he was nearly in pain.

"Cas, can I talk to you for a minute?" Dean asked quietly, motioning towards the other room.

Castiel scrambled to his feet. He followed Dean as they walked down to the panic room.

Castiel was a bit confused about why they would need to go down the stairs, but he was off his guard. This was Dean. If Castiel could trust anyone, it was Dean.

Dean arrived at the entrance of the panic room and he walked in first. Castiel hesitated slightly before following him in.

Dean turned slowly to face him. His face was dark and only then did Castiel begin to question what was going on.

The older Winchester circled back around Castiel slowly until he was closest to the door. Dean stepped out of the room and grabbed the door.

He looked sympathetically at Castiel before muttering "I'm sorry" and slamming the door.

Castiel stood staring at the door in shock for a minute before taking in what had happened. It took Castiel several moments to move at all.

He walked slowly closer to the door and simply stared. He didn't feel angry. He only felt betrayed.

After silently standing in front of the door for a while, Castiel found a seat on the ground against the wall and stared at his feet. He let his mind drift.

Outside of the panic room, Dean remained outside the heavy door. He listened closely, expecting to hear Castiel yell at him through the door.

But Dean didn't hear anything. Only silence. He was seriously considering opening the door. He was worried. Any reaction was better than this.

Just as Dean had grabbed the door to free Castiel, Sam walked up behind him.

"So, he's in there?" Sam said, gesturing at the door.

Dean stepped away from the door and turned to face Sam. "Yeah, he's in there." He said, feeling slightly annoyed at Sam for no reason at all.

Sam looked at the door and back at Dean. He smiled slightly. "Is this weird?"

"What?" Dean questioned sharply.

"You know… me and you being here together, with someone else trapped in that room. I mean, usually it's one of us in there and the other one's beating themselves up over it. It's just a little weird both being here." Sam finished, staring intently at Dean.

Dean wasn't amused. "Well now we can both 'beat ourselves up' over throwing Cas in there." Dean snapped back.

Sam took a slight step away from Dean. "Sorry man. I was just… I don't know, observing. I'm sure Cas will understand. We're trying to help him. He's a smart guy. He'll realize this is for the best."

Dean shook his head. "It's just not right. You and me… we deserved being stuck in that room. Cas, he doesn't. He's done nothing but help us. Hell, he's literally saved my life more times than I can count. Trapping him in there like some animal isn't right."

Sam gazed at the door for a moment before turning back to Dean. "We have to do this." He said, and quietly turned to go back to Bobby.

Dean followed him.


	8. Chapter 8

**Author's Note: Yes, I am that loser that makes Cas sleep through the Apocalypse. But, we all know what basically happens. Enjoy and please review!**

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Castiel sat back on the ground of the panic room. He had tried everything. He's searched everywhere. There was no way to get out of this damn room.

It had been hours since Castiel had heard anyone out in Bobby's house and he was growing anxious. Of course, he knew exactly what was happening. The end of the world.

He had known that without his powers, he was a bit of a burden, but this? Locking him in a small room while Dean, Sam, and Bobby probably got themselves killed, this was just cruel.

Castiel yawned and decided that he might as well sleep. He'd searched every corner of the room four times over. Searching again wouldn't help anything. He lied down on the hard, cold ground and fell asleep.

Suddenly a loud sound in Bobby's house woke Castiel. His eyes snapped open and he sat up at lightning speed. He had no idea how long he had slept, but it felt like a while. His whole body ached slightly in response to his uncomfortable position.

The door in front of him suddenly moved. Someone was here. Someone had survived. Castiel's mind raced in anticipation of who would be behind the door. Maybe it was all of them. Maybe everyone had lived. That was improbable though, of course. Chances were they were all dead. Perhaps an angel was letting him out. Also highly unlikely. It could be anyone.

The door swung open in an instant and Castiel's questions melted away. Dean Winchester stood bloody and barely conscious in front of him. Only Dean. No one else.

Castiel jumped to his feet and rushed to catch Dean as he swayed on his feet. Castiel steadied him and led him to sit on the couch.

Any anger that Castiel had for Dean was gone the moment he had seen his broken face.

On the couch, Dean seemed to regain his composure a bit. He leaned forward and placed his head in his hands, sighing loudly as he did so. After a moment, he looked up and Castiel.

"Bobby's dead." He said suddenly. "Lucifer." He offered as an answer to any question Castiel might have.

Dean hesitated for a moment before speaking again. "Sammy…" Dean cleared his throat. "Sammy's gone." Dean's eyes filled with unwanted tears. "I couldn't save him, Cas. I… I couldn't save either of them. I watched them both die. Right in front of me, I had to watch my own brother die. He sacrificed himself, you know. Stupid son of a bitch sacrificed himself. That was supposed to be me. It's my job. I should have taken care of Sam. I'm always supposed to take care of Sam." Dean leaned forward into his hands again. He was crying silently now.

Castiel stared at him. His face was blank and seemingly emotionless. He didn't know what to say or do.

Dean spoke again. "And you know, I was dead. I was gone. Lucifer had killed me too."

At this, a worried expression filled Castiel's face.

"But then… something, hell, I don't know, God brought me back. Why did he bring me back? To make me suffer? I'd rather be dead, Cas. I've got nothing left."

Castiel leaned slowly towards Dean. He placed his hand on Dean's shoulder. "You, Dean Winchester, are the bravest man I have ever met." Castiel said seriously.

Dean didn't answer, but he glanced up at Castiel. They sat in silence for nearly an hour.

Castiel never moved his hand from Dean's shoulder, even as the man cried and shook from all that had happened.

Castiel sat with the broken and beaten remains of the man that was Dean Winchester.

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**Author's Note: Yes, I know. This is ridiculously short. But I felt that for a chapter like this, it was definitely about the quality instead of quantity. I hope you enjoyed. Please review! Thanks.**


	9. Chapter 9

**Author's Note: It's been a while, but I assure you, I haven't given up on this story. In fact, I've been working on it a lot. I haven't posted in a while and I'm sorry. Life is busy. Please comment if you enjoy! Comment even if you don't enjoy. Feedback is my favorite!**

Dean sat steel-faced behind the wheel of the Impala. Castiel was in the passenger's seat beside him.

After Dean had gotten control of himself, he had announced that he had a promise to keep. Castiel was confused, but didn't ask any questions. Instead, he silently helped Dean pack up the Impala and settled in for the unknown trip.

Dean gripped the wheel so tightly that his knuckles were white. A hundred questions about what had happened jumped to Castiel's mind, but he knew now was not the time. Dean was fragile… more fragile than the angel had ever seen him. Castiel, even without any powers, was now forced to be the strong one.

Dean drove silently until he had arrived at a house. In the silence, Castiel lost track of time. Dean pulled the Impala to a stop and sat, staring at the bright windows. Tears filled the man's eyes again. Castiel scrutinized the house, trying to understand why they were here.

Without a word, Dean left the car and walked up the steps of the house. A small, attractive woman opened the door. Dean looked at the ground and then back to Castiel. The woman pulled Dean's arm, as if to invite him inside, but the hunter only turned around and walked quickly back to the car.

He got in, started the car, and sped away from the house. Finally, Castiel had to question him. "Dean," He started.

"Cas, don't…" Dean interrupted, shaking his head slightly.

Castiel fell silent and looked out the window. Dean glanced over at him and drew a sharp breath.

"Here's the deal." The hunter spoke quickly, as if he was afraid he wouldn't be able to finish. "We're getting your Grace back. I don't care what it takes. We're getting it. Then, you're going to the Pit and you're pulling Sammy out. That's the plan."

"Dean, I don't think I… I… even with my full powers getting your brother back may be impossible." Castiel struggled to find the words to let the hopeful man down. "That Pit is designed to keep the most powerful of angels confined. I don't possess the power…"

Dean held up a hand and interrupted. "No. This is what we're doing. This will work." He said, sounding as though even he was unsure of the plan. "Maybe you won't be able to get him, but someone will. We just… we need to get your Grace."

Castiel sighed and decided against continued arguing. "How do you propose we get my Grace back?" The angel asked sharply.

Dean looked grimly at the road. "We're going to need some help with that." He said.

Castiel resisted the urge to make a snide comment, being around the Winchesters had made him constantly feel like saying something sarcastic.

"Look Dean, I do not want to upset you, but we have to be realistic. There may be no possible way to get your brother back. This isn't what he would want for you. Sam would want you…"

"Stop!" Dean yelled, slamming on the brakes. The car screeched and came to a sudden stop. Luckily, there were no cars in sight behind them. Dean's voice shook as he spoke. Castiel wasn't sure if it was in anger or sadness. "Don't you dare tell me what Sam would want. Don't you even… don't say his name." Dean finished lowly.

The angel found himself wincing slightly at Dean's harsh words. "Let's get my Grace back. We'll make a deal with whoever we need to. We will get your brother back." Castiel said finally.

He didn't really even believe his own words, but he needed Dean to believe them. The man needed some kind of hope. It was the only way he could keep going. Keep living.

The hunter didn't answer, but Castiel could have sworn he saw Dean smirk slightly as he stared at the road.


End file.
